It has been said that relationships can be the most difficult yoga. Relationships require the same effort, focus, and flexibility as other relationships. As in yoga, marriage and romantic relationships are like saluting the sun every day. We strive to bring out the best in each other and our lives. We adapt to the unexpected and work with conflict to make it work. And we stretch by loving our partner, even when it’s difficult. It can be just as difficult to find the balance between autonomy and intimacy when trying to achieve it.

Many couples are looking for the magic bullet in navigating the many challenges. There are many keys to healthy relationships and loving communication. There are no two love stories the same. Each couple must navigate their way through life’s difficulties. In love and marriage, there are no one-size-fits all. Finding your groove as a couple can bring long-lasting benefits. It’s worth the effort and dedication!

Let’s look at the most common problems in relationships, and then we will discuss some ways to improve your relationship.

Top Love Relationship Challenges

• The division of household chores: Who does which?
• Money conflict: Is there any contribution equity? Are one or both partners frugal? Or are they both risk-takers and savers?
• Work stress.
• Different parenting styles and levels of involvement
• Problems with sex, including affairs and infidelity.
• The in-laws: Their financial support, influence, involvement, and expectations.
• Diverse ideas for recreation and adventure-seeking.
• Tech addiction: Is a bedroom safe from tech use? What is reasonable phone usage?
• Spend quality time together, rather than on your own.
• Both partners are expecting the other to be a mind reader.
• Unhealthy boundaries.

These challenges are common enough that you have likely faced them all. Sometimes they seem impossible to overcome. There are three things you can do that will help to keep your love alive and improve your relationship.

Each step in the three tips that I will share will require you to master yours. Although it is not always easy to apply and master these tips, they will be a game-changer once you do! These tips will help you create a strong and loving relationship that you will be able to look back on with amazement.

Tips to a Healthy, Loving Marriage and a Strong Love Relationship!

TIP #1 – Honor Your Differences

Expectations of our spouses to be like us can lead to more conflict in love and marriage. They aren’t! Once we understand this, we can begin to respect our differences and not use them as fuel for fighting and arguments.

TIP #2 – Presume Innocence

It is easy to assume that we know what our partner thinks or is doing, but it is easy to make this assumption.

Don’t!

A long time ago, I was contacted by a client who claimed that her boyfriend had an affair. Instead of talking with her jealousy, she started checking his emails and texts, followed him to work and stewed in her worries until she felt sick. She couldn’t find any evidence to support her fears of her shock.

We explored her anxiety further, and she revealed a strange and disturbing memory she had when she was eight. Her dad’s shouting had woken her up in the middle of the night. He was accusing her mother of having an affair. We worked together to reconcile the tender feelings of a little boy that had remained with her. Her obsession with her boyfriend’s behaviour dissipated.

TIP #3 – Ask better questions of yourself and your partner

Asking more meaningful questions leads to higher quality answers, greater understanding, exploration, and deeper trust in our partners and ourselves.

• Instead of asking your partner why they keep forgetting to empty the trash, ask them what motivates them.
• Instead of getting mad at your spouse and throwing emotions at them, be calm and ask yourself: “What about my partner’s behavior triggered you?”
• Instead of complaining about your partner’s inability to open up or badgering them to speak with you, think: “Am I saying anything that makes it unsafe for me to be open and honest?”

Try to understand your partner’s point of view. You will learn to accept how your partner may view life, work, and family.